Help Me See

You Don't Have To Figure It All Out To Feel Good w/Jenny Sanchez

December 14, 2022 Bianca Morra Season 2 Episode 64
Help Me See
You Don't Have To Figure It All Out To Feel Good w/Jenny Sanchez
Show Notes Transcript

Truth be told- I need this podcast episode today. 

(Isn't it funny how sometimes we can feel so wise & totally “get it” and then other times you're growling and slamming cabinets like an angsty teenager because you were delivered soggy celery from the grocery store. ((the celery was the final straw.)))

This will forever be the podcast episode where I talked with a tissue in my hand the entire time. I feel like I've been sick for a month & now I'm writing to you at 6 am with a sick kid home from school AGAIN. My eyes are burning and I'm listening to a christmas toy song on repeat for the 14 billionth time and my eye is starting to twitch.

I have been tired, achey, & overwhelmed BUT this conversation reminds me that I don't need to figure out the answers to my life before taking the next step.

This idea that in order to move forward, we must unpack everything or need to figure out all the answers is paralyzing. And also, false.

Today on the show, my dear friend Jenny Sanchez. She calls herself the bad yoga teacher and she just created a wellness resource called Lessons From a Bad Yoga Teacher.  We talk about her story, her reason behind creating the resource she did, & why feeling good can feel like SUCH A STRUGGLE.  She essentially boils down centuries of sage wisdom into modern bullet points.

She is hilarious, real, & there is approximately zero sugar coating. In fact the preview clip includes the big reveal: there is no “i have arrived.” There is no point in which we are immune to falling into a slump of feeling like shit. The point of this episode is talking about how the real magic is harnessing the ability to trust yourself to get back to feeling good bit by bit. It's not sexy sounding- but it is real and true and one of the most powerful things you can know.

More from Jenny-

15 minute Free Writing Challenge

Free Memory Savoring Resource from Bianca-

See Nostalgia Now Guide

Upcoming Course for Photographic Artists- JOIN WAITLIST HERE

More from Bianca:

Monthly Membership: Nostalgia, Now.



but I think as we get better at wellness and you know how much I hate that word but like we're living consciously or putting all the things into place we get better at not being so attached to the shitty feelings and knowing that okay I'm feeling like a crap but now so let me put these couple things into place and get myself back to feeling better I feel like but it's inevitable that it's that that that constant back and forth

no this is huge just up front like this expectation like let's like pull the curtain up there is no I have arrived there is no wow now now help me see as a podcast that redefines the word Vision through vulnerable and real conversations my own private introspective ramblings about the things that I think about in the wee hours of the morning and my deep core belief that your nothingness is your everything and all you have to do is see

I'm your host I am an educator photographic artist and I believe that your daily photo habit can be the key to unlocking the ability to be more present in your everyday life and live deeper into your intention and purpose we're not about the small talk here grab your coffee get cozy and let's talk hello hello and welcome to another episode of help me see I got sick again I have been out of quarantine for a week and a half and then I got hit like really hit with I think the flu I don't know I didn't even have the energy to go um find out for sure but I've been completely laid up I actually felt worse this time than last time and it's really interesting to me

it was really interesting to experience this and feel like what is happening last time when I had covid for the first time just the other week I had said to myself you know what this is like an odd blessing because I had come back from a retreat where I did a lot of soul searching and I felt like the covid really forced me to commit almost to my to my findings and then I kind of feel like I don't I'm not really trying to get all woo-woo but at the same time

I know a virus is a virus and it's flu season and you know there's all that and I have a kid in daycare and that happens but I almost feel like the fact that once I've recovered or felt better human from covid I just immediately started to try to do do again try to like catch up and catch up and then I got knocked on my ass again and I kind of feel like it's

okay I got it noted noted I think in this season and as I end this year and welcome another year I I think I need to move differently and give myself more grace um just as a as a normal life full-time situation not give myself Grace when it's really um busy or tough or when I'm not feeling well but give myself Grace all the time and not deplete myself to the point where this is what happens uh can any of you feel feel that do you do you feel like there's a nugget in there meant for you like what if we put our self-care in the front and not behind a huge task like as a reward but rather as a way of being so we don't set ourselves up for needing it so urgently feels a lot more sustainable to me that is something my coach Haley Carr speaks about a lot it is you know front loading front loading the things that feel so good for you so that you can work from a place of already fulfilling fulfilled instead of working yourself ragged and then rewarding yourself and then getting back on it again and I really really really love that teaching anyway so I'm actually today on the show we have this is my conversation with my friend Jenny from last week and it's really good I love her so much Jenny calls herself the bad yoga teacher and she is just she is the person that you probably want to learn Wellness from because she hates the word wellness and she

hilarious and I just love her to pieces and she has this gorgeous real authentic and genuine way of wanting to help people feel better now like not okay let's roll up her sleeves and do this huge big deep work that seems really scary and overwhelming and who knows what we're gonna find then we need to just take our time like she's really committed to getting people to move and feel good in the now in a very sustainable and doable way and um we're talking about this new product she's launching um lessons from a bad yoga teacher she's working on a book she's just an incredible human being that I feel so lucky to have met in the last couple years of my life and I know that you're going to enjoy this conversation I had so much fun something that is so so helpful in the way that Jenny talks uh in this episode issue refers to this her definition of happiness is she talks about it being the ability to to know that you can get yourself back to feeling good no matter what because obviously life is gonna throw a lot of stuff at us and it's not there's there's no one-size-fits all there's no oh I've solved this and I'm Invincible but there is this feeling that you can have of invincibility around knowing that no matter what even if XYZ I know that there are things that I can do to to connect to myself away in a way that feels good and that it can get me out of this out of this slump and out of this heaviness um Bit by Bit by Bit we have this really powerful conversation around that and I really really really really really really think it will be helpful and useful uh just on a personal note I have found that I find myself on a pendulum very often this pendulum of like far left and then far right in that okay I'm feeling so good and I don't give a f what else is happening this is what I'm doing horse blinders whatever and then all of a sudden I'll be on the other side of the pendulum one day I wake up and I'm like everything's crap just everything is just terrible I am terrible what I'm creating is terrible

I just I don't understand it I don't understand how I can feel like that but I what Jenny's talking about is this ability to like know that you won't always be able to avoid those pendulum swings but you can experience them and also hold this truth and a knowing ability of being able to pull yourself out of it quicker and not be slumped into it for so long um our subconscious and our nervous systems are running the show so much and I think that when we're able to look at our feelings a little bit more objectively as hard as that can sound it can feel less daunting like I think about how I could have those feelings about my work when I'm in an area where I have the opportunity to overthink but when I am in my work like when I'm in a session when I have my camera in my hands when I'm witnessing someone Everything feels perfect no matter what it's crazy like it it is like another worldly experience for me like I I am in my happy place time doesn't exist two hours feels like 10 minutes maybe um it is I mean I like fall in love with the people that are in front of me I feel like I see them on so many different levels uh sometimes I even feel like I don't I'm like have I have I been talking have I even said anything I don't even know I just get lost in another world and it's so powerful and beautiful and there's no you know the ego is really what makes us question ourselves and feel insecure about our work and you know worry about what other people think or what they're not thinking or you know whatever but when you're in a state of true flow and you're in something that feels so right there is no space for for that crap right it's it's when we're not in those in those situations where we're in our highest state and in our flow and feeling our best and feel like we have the answers to the universe that we can really get drugged drugged down into overthinking and and getting a little bit lost and what Jenny is offering is her perspectives on how to feel your feelings but also be able to get on with living your life in a day-to-day way and and I don't think a lot of people talk about it the way she talks about it so I really look forward to having you hear what she has to say I apologize in advance for my nasally sounding voice and if you end up watching the YouTube video you will see I'm holding a tissue in my hand the whole time I don't understand why I didn't just put the tissue down like all of the clips I'm like I'm holding a tissue it's disgusting um so I have that for you that's a huge treat um to go ahead at the end of the show if you want to learn more about Jenny check out the show notes and um you'll find her links there but before that I happened upon a an audio clip that I took putting my son to bed and it is so precious and I I wanted to put it in here as a reminder to all of us of how like these sweet nothing conversations that are so so deeply meaningful in our lives there are ways that we can save them that don't feel intrusive and for me that is going to my voice memos and hitting record and putting my phone down on the pillow and just snuggling with my son and recording his little little voice saying the sweetest things to me um you know I it's a different time now we have different capabilities I don't have stuff like that from when I was that age you know and I think that I just wanted to show an example of something that I do in my everyday life in an effort to keep these little magical moments uh that feels very easy and effortless and exponentially powerful so also I will probably send this clip to my son I made an email address for both of my kids and every once in a while I'll email them some pictures or I'll send them a note or something like that and um so when they're old enough they'll get to have that and have all these old emails from from me and probably only me and their Grandma my mom that he knows that I don't think that their dad has emailed them once yet but it is a really cute idea so I just wanted to throw that in there so I am going to put this sweet little clip of my son going to bed he's uh he's four and uh and then after that you'll hear from Jenny about all of the ways in which we can feel better in our lives and really have the have the muscle to be able to get back to feeling better quicker instead of finding ourselves stuck in the sludges of feeling like [ __ ] what's wrong Mom nothing I love you very so much


[Music] I love you so much catchy monsters

over here

you make my heart so happy and chill I'm so happy my heart is so happy thank you

I love you bigger than a volcano I'm gonna look like a nest here I love you bigger Dana universe no I am a big red T-Rex I love you bigger than uh mosasaurus no we're not bigger than the mosasaurus okay T-Rex wins

it's cute

I love you so much buddy

me too um okay good night

sweet dreams right so you either thought that was painfully boring or were near tears I I'm a little bit biased I was near tears but I get like that listening to complete strangers talk to their kids so I don't know maybe I'm different but if this clip uh touched her heart it you might want to go and download my free resource C Nostalgia now um it's my tried and true PDF of just beautiful easy real life No Frills ways to save really precious memories and when you sign up for the freebie you get the download and then you also will be on my mailing list where I share um just more info uh background about the podcast episodes and also special offerings coming up and speaking of special offerings coming up if you are a photographic artist an intentional photographer uh someone that loves to make meaning with their images and feels like uh there's just so much more that they want to be saying with their work than your bigger picture is a wait list that you're going to want to get on it is my upcoming program for Visionary photographic artists to create with freedom purpose and intention it will be coming out in the new year and if you want to learn more about it and stay updated on when it is available then and also I will be having a free Workshop before it launches so regardless if you want to participate in any of the upcoming activities around this celebration of this new launch then get on the waitlist for that as well okay enjoy Jenny hello and welcome to another episode of help me see today we have my beloved Jenny Sanchez um I met Jenny what now a year ago or two years ago I don't even know I can't believe we've never even hung out in person before uh Jenny is someone that you want to know and she is the perfect person to talk to about what I want to talk to today about today and it's this idea of when we're doing all the things that we think we should be doing so that we can feel a certain way you know it's like if you know doing the things to help yourself and you're still not there you're still not feeling the way you want to [ __ ] feel my favorite example is what that she gave and it stuck with me is like when you leave yoga class and you just like Zend yourself out and then you're in traffic and you're cursing at everyone on the road like why can I bring that there why do I leave my you know all of the progress I make on the mat So today we're just going to talk a little bit about that why that is and you know a little bit about Jenny's story so Jenny welcome thank you for coming on today thank you yay you know and I just just even when you just said that I I I don't think we ever don't like I don't think that Pink Pack Matt ping pong match ever stops I just think we get better at redirecting ourselves back to feeling good like as much as we possibly can but I don't think it ever stops and I think that's where like wellness and all these theories people get so frustrated because they're like why do I still feel shitty and because you're gonna feel like that but once you like because it's inevitable because you're a living you're having a human experience and you know it's that's it but I think as we get better at wellness and you know how much I hate that word but like um or living consciously or putting all of the things into place we get better at not being so attached to the shitty feelings and knowing that okay I'm feeling like a crap but now so let me put these couple things into place and get myself back to feeling better I feel like but it's inevitable that it's that it's that that that constant back and forth can keep going I think nobody really said that no so you're like I have a wellness failure no yeah I'm like Madness no this is huge just up front like this expectation like let's like pull the curtain up there is no I have arrived there is no way wow now now and I mean maybe life would be boring if we arrived maybe it would be like well now but it's maybe what would be the point I don't know I mean I feel like it would be great yeah apparently that's not what we're here to do well you this is not some you know new revelation for you because you have have based like your your business and like everything that you've created to help others in the world off of this Foundation of uh what do you call yourself a bad yoga teacher

tell us just tell us more about it yeah well I I had a business painting and I met a girl in doing a very big job and we you know when you just like meet someone you're like sort of like you and I where you're like yes this is again that I will stay forever friends with I love her you started painting I didn't know you were painting I did I had a painting business for like 10 years I was a paint contractor okay I wasn't supposed to discover something new in this conversation look that's so incredible okay yeah I did like Venetian plaster and all this stuff so I had been contracted to do a huge job up in Northern Florida and I met this woman on the job and she did yoga and at that time I was teaching like Fitness and anything that was you know hardcore I was into running all of that stuff she dragged me to a yoga class spend I didn't love it I thought it was a little bit silly it was hot yoga class in this background I was like I couldn't stop laughing you know I had to Giggles the whole time it's like I was talking to her I was that like annoying so mature and I ended up not going back we merged our faces and I had my body was hurting from all of the working out that I was doing so I really wish she would go to yoga and she just wouldn't shut up about it and so I went finally just to shut her off I still do whatever you want but if I don't like it after what you tell me to do I'm not going back so she said you have to go three days a week for a month I don't care if you hate every class you take I don't want you to judge it you just have to stick with it at the end of the month if you hate it I'll never bring it up again and it's fine so that's what I did and I think the first week I took five classes and I was totally hooked I loved it I loved everything about it but I did not love the community that I saw there and and the way the people are I don't even know how to explain it it just seemed like something was

um off or or not connecting with far as like what you and I are even talking about you know like this was like magic yoga was magic and you were just like all of your problems were going to be solved if you do these 26 postures in this order every single day and it just felt like really because that seems a little ridiculous yeah I'll try but like I don't know so maybe I'll give it a whirl all bites I'll bite I'm eating the whole freaking meal but you know did you feel like when you're in the class that like you're like okay I'm having this experience and I really love it but like what what about like it made you realize that like you weren't loving what seemed to be the what was it the consensus about what you guys were there to do like just a little bit more into that how you were like not resonating with that Community part yeah because it was I saw nasty people like you're saying like it would be it would literally be people fighting over a spot in the yoga room or you know like it's cursing out you know each other within even traffic and someone cuts each other off and it I ended up opening yoga studio because of her she was like you really should open a studio I went to the training I did the whole thing and then I saw even more of it because I was there all the time and and I felt that even in myself you know here it was a yoga teacher practicing several times a day um and really dedicated to the practice but still even finding those things within myself and and knowing that like there had to be more to it and and also I I noticed that if I taught a class and I didn't mention all the yoga stuff I could get people to do it all so if I stopped using Sanskrit for example and I just said let's do Eagle pose everybody would do it but if I said let's do garasana everybody would look at me like yeah you do RS and I'll watch it you know and so I I started to just kind of I had been teaching for a while before so I I wasn't new to teaching but I realized if I if I Stripped Away like the stuff that we're supposed to say or the way it's supposed to be taught and I made it more relatable to people who were cursing each other out in traffic and and did find those urges within themselves and were struggling at work and at home and all of these things that I could reach them and I could help them open up to ideas that maybe seemed a little fruitful for them before and so it made me feel like a bad yoga teacher because here I was not using sanskrap not you know having barbecues after classes like you know we would my husband's Argentinian so we would have a Friday class with a huge barbecue after you know we were like in the practice and the smell of you know sausages is going on in the background but it got people to come and it got them to really feel like oh I could do this you know maybe this isn't just for yoga teachers or or you know people who are into that kind of stuff maybe it is for me and so but but within the yoga Community I always felt like a bad yoga teacher teacher because I wasn't doing it the way people were doing it then well it's funny too it sounds like you were you were changing the way you were teaching in order to connect deeper with your students and like reach them but that was also coming from a very like like a me too place like uh yeah I agree I don't really well I could be you know sitting here acting like I'm sitting on a pillow you know floating in the air either yeah yeah and I mean I mean for me the practice started out very physical and I think it does for a lot of people I think there's always usually one thing that pulls us into that wellness world whether you you connect right away with meditation or right away with writing or right away with a physical practice it's like that one thing that pulls you in um and for me it was definitely the physical part I mean just what I physically felt and what I physically saw I really liked and that helped me motivate it to keep going but it had to be done in a way that felt like it fit into my life and the things I wanted to do um otherwise they you just you don't stick with it you know you don't you don't ever feel like you're fully involved or committed so fast forward to now and you are still continuing this work but often well you still are physically continuing this work but now you're diving into the world of like creating resources for people to take this this mindset that we're talking about and um really what I would say is a really rare and refreshing um healthy way to empower yourself with um with support with the support you need I think self I don't know if it's the algorithm and it's just me that's inundated with all of this stuff or if it's everyone but I find that in an attempt to help everyone feel better there's just so many resources constantly showing us what's wrong or what you could be doing or what we need to be doing or if we want to feel like this we should do this and you've created something with the most amount of freedom and autonomy that I've ever witnessed in any resource any Wellness resource sorry I have to say it because it is

um and I really want to tell our listeners about it so can you can explain a little bit about where this idea came from and what it is and what it's meant to do yeah so when I was having Studios I'll tell you a little bit about myself just because it'll make a little bit more sense but my my I lost my mom when I was 25 to cancer and then a few months later my father-in-law got sick and then a few months later my mother-in-law got sick and then my dad got sick with dementia and so I spent about 10 years caring for my dad um and also my in-laws so by the time I was like about 38 everybody passed like one right after the other and I really was left feeling like I didn't know how to feel good you know my whole adult life had been lived in a way that was filled with anxiety and grief and stress and and owning business even though it was a yoga studio it's stressful you know so like all of this stuff was happening and it was right after everyone passed we I took a trip with my husband and we were sitting in a like a small Airbnb in North Carolina and I had a few glasses of wine and I you know I said to him I just feel riddled with stress like I can feel it and I no amount of yoga is helping me release it and and I need to I if I'm going to continue I need to release this I can't keep going like this felt so again it also started with the physical for me because I felt it it like I could like imagine it in my body so I started being more open to this idea of maybe I need to look into how I'm feeling why I'm feeling it how can I course correct but I really didn't want number one to dig that deep because I just I knew where most of it was coming from you know it's like how do I fix it now how do I start to do things right now that maybe I'm not going to feel 100 better but I will definitely feel something today and so I read and I looked and I did all of the things even the things that I felt ridiculous most of it's boring most of it is um ancient you know we you and I are like ancient wisdom right translated into something modern and and you have to read the ancient staff because it does make a lot of sense but then you have to translate it down which takes time and practice and trial and error and so I did all of it and I really got myself to a place where I still have the ping pong match obviously because I think that is part of Being Human but I definitely have the tools in place to know how to constantly get myself back to feeling good so never like sucked into the bad space or the bad experiences because I feel happiness for me is knowing that I have the tools to get myself out and into where I want to be so I wrote it all down for myself and I did this like manual for myself because I didn't want to forget any of it all the stuff that worked and then I was like I looked at it and thought Oh my God this could like this could help a lot of people you know because it was so doable and easy and I was doing it every day with a busy life and a stressful life and all sorts of [ __ ] going on and I was still able to maintain the practice it just it wasn't overwhelming um and when I did find myself stuck I could open the manual and say all right I have this writing exercise that I did that totally got me out of this last time so like let me just sit down and do this um and so that's how it all came up so I started to kind of put it out there to my to my students and it was I started in like a course format um where I was more present and I just felt that that was overwhelming to people it was like their lives were already too busy to then sit down with me for an hour or they didn't want to be in front of the zoom anymore you know or it just it had to be done at a certain time so so over the past year I've just evolved it into audios they wanted to listen like it seemed like anybody could just pop something in for 10 minutes get what they needed and apply it to their day so again you're in this situation where like no you haven't fixed all your [ __ ] but you you feel better as you're fixing it so you're not waiting for it to be fixed to feel good you're feeling good as you're working through the staff and and that's what I wanted to give to everybody so it's like a digital library basically with 10 minute or less audios where you can go in and some of them are meditations but again I've been teaching meditation for a while I couldn't get people to to say like I'll become a meditator or be open to meditating so I was like how can I do these were they going to get all the benefits of meditation without feeling like they're meditating so there's lessons baked into the meditations you know so you're not sitting there trying to concentrate on your breath you're you're learning something that then we're out of the meditation you can apply to your life and the rest of your day um that was something that bugged me about yoga and meditation with this idea that when you're sitting on your ass or you're on your mat is the most important part and then when you're off of it you go right back to feeling the way you felt before it's like no no I'm supposed to learn in the practice and then apply it when we're moving and living because otherwise what's the point like who who cares if you're good at meditation or who cares if you're even good at yoga if then you're a total you know hot mess when you're walking around the rest of the day right right so you know it's it's funny because this is it for me something like this at first would feel very begrudging because I'm a very like All or Nothing person I'm like you know the idea of like oh you don't just like fix your closet you pull [ __ ] everything out everything else and you know I'm either working out five days a week or not for five months um but this idea that I've really come to know and believe to be true is what you're saying it's this bit by bit by bit like it's the only way to like make sustainable real change for yourself and have you seen the documentary that's out uh called Stutz it's Jonah Hill's documentary I know yeah I just watched it I just I love it what you're saying right now and I did think about you and I watched it you so genius uh his what's his name Stutz his name is Stutz the therapist yeah because he was saying at a time where his he was up and coming and people that were teaching him were like you're crazy I they need to feel good now they need to feel good [ __ ] now like you know tell them what to do you're not supposed to like we're supposed to dig deep and what they have to leave with hope um and this is exactly what you're talking about like I have Goosebumps talking about it it's like you yes there's plenty of [ __ ] there's always gonna be for all of us plenty of stuff and scary things to pull out of the closet if you want to go there but in order to even feel light enough to take one step we need to feel good now and do the smallest win and experience that and this is what you're giving people yeah that's really the idea because it so much of it comes in a subtle step we're taught to to look for these big gigantic games or like this idea that one day I'm gonna wake up and I've arrived and I'm happy and everything's falling into place and it's it's really the subtle thing that if you can learn to pay attention give you that hope because that subtle shift of Shifting yourself from not feeling great to shifting back to feeling good or just just the awareness of knowing that you're not the bad mood that it's just an experience you're having right now just that subtle difference changes everything I think that we completely underestimate these tiny important things that you're talking about like a journaling like there's so many times where I'll read really helpful journaling prompts and then not actually [ __ ] do it and it's underestimating how powerful those tiny things can be and completely overestimating the what we will gain out of doing the bigger things like physically going to a class or working towards this big goal and it's ironically it's exactly what I teach in my photo practice like it's the same thing it's like I'm telling people like it's beautiful um yes to all of it it's beautiful to have these photographs of events and whatever but like the event doesn't mean anything compared to like all of the little things and the quiet intimate tiny moments of your life that got you there um so it's the same conversation it's just echoed in parallel ways yeah yeah yeah yeah it's a I just wrote something about because this is important also like you know it's not about the journey it's not about the destination it's the journey and that always pisses me off that sentence because I want to get to the [ __ ] destination so like I yeah I just can't you know I'm like maybe that makes me less spiritual but I don't understand the point of all the goals and putting it into place if we're never gonna actually arrive there but if the journey is enjoyable you usually get to the destination way quicker and if you can appreciate the journey if you can take note of it I feel like it makes everything fall into place easier so again like these subtle steps that you're taking daily you know because it's daily stop and that's it and I think people don't realize how much the action matters like not just reading something or listening to it but what action are you taking afterwards what are you then applying to your life without that person telling you how to do it how does it feel for you you know what do you notice when you're in action you know I teach this thing called mindfulness emotion for that same reason because it felt to me like okay great I'm sitting on my butt and I'm listening to my breath and that's all fine and good but how do I then apply that mindfulness when I'm when I have all this stimulation going on around me how do I ground myself in action um and and I think that's the most important thing and I think it's the people I think that's what people don't realize that's more important it's not so much that you're sitting yes you're getting a lot of practice in the sitting and you need that because otherwise you don't get it and you only know by experiencing right so you can read it but if you don't experience it for yourself you never really know it so yeah it's important but it doesn't have to be done in one specific way at one time and it there's there's so much that you can do and it's always changing and and you had a change with it you know and um and I think people feel nervous about that also they just don't know where to look you know you just you have all this stuff coming at you but most of the time you're going like I don't like that person or what they're you know that's not the link I'm gonna click so where do I look or it's just you get caught in the sleep if you're if you like everyone and you get caught in the sleep of intake and you can make yourself think that you're benefiting but really you're just intaking but you're not into grading um and this is a really slippery slope it's a very slippery slope and it all so well intentioned um but to really pause and get still with yourself to pause and get still with yourself um and find yourself in the practice um that's that's what we're talking about here so oh the destination we're talking about the destination you were like yeah but I want to get there I want to get there but it's you know it's all of the action that we're taking but really talk about an annoying thing to say it's the debt the ultimate destination is that internal destination of what you talked about the second you started talking when you came on it was like happiness which is the ability to know like it's like an invincibility almost it's like yeah I know no matter what I can get myself to this like I am not avoiding life I am not immune to pain I am not never gonna get pissed off or make mistakes but I always know that I can pull myself out I'm not going to stay in the sludge um I'll sit there for as long as I need to and then I know what to do to move and what to do to move isn't to like Sprint out because you can't but it's taking those like tiny steps and so back to this resource that you've made what is it called lessons from a bad yoga teacher and how do you envision uh people using this like because I mean I can make all these assumptions because I've been privy to these amazing conversations about what you're doing all along the way but when you finish creating this and you think about it in the hands of someone that is just going through [ __ ] like don't yourself like through that period of time where you were just dealing with loss after loss after loss after loss um how do you envision this resource being used like an open tab on the computer that's how I see it it's like it's just always there and you just you look at it once a day and you just say oh yeah okay right that's what I'm gonna listen to or one is like really let's say because I have for example there's a section called survival kit right so I put in a series of meditations that are again they're not meditations it's like walking yourself through how to understand how to get yourself to feeling better even if it's just for a few minutes because again it's that subtle shift in knowing that I got myself to feel better in 10 minutes which means I can just keep reapplying this over and over and over again as I go through my day even if I keep going back to not feeling great because my life is is up in the air right now I I'm learning how to shift it in the direction I want it to go so you know maybe you're just working with one that like really resonates with you at that time and for you know a month you're listening to the one and then you go okay I really got this like I really integrated this I've seen myself do it now without meeting Jenny in my ears so like what else do we got going on in there or you know I'm feeling really anxious today how do I learn how to move through that and then you just continue to apply it so I do see it as just like an open tab on the computer it's definitely how I use it um it's it's something I go to all the time daily to say you know and you learn how to make decisions and and based on what you're feeling and what you need which I think is so important I was just talking to people don't know how to make decisions and and we make we feel like we're making so many during the day but most of them don't apply to what you actually want or how you actually feel um and so it's a way for you to sit and make a decision what what am I what do I need right now what's going to help me right now or or what will really benefit my life now um and decide which one and use it and their practices and meditations and and but nothing where you're feeling overwhelmed or you know to prove through or again if you are feeling really bad it's not I'm not asking you to make a huge leap it's just a little tool that you're going to use and you're going to keep repeating until it's like oh wow okay I got it right and it didn't make me want to you know lose my lunch when I was doing it bye I just love that how from every every angle it's always directing you back to like this place of like autonomy and empowerment like true autonomy and true empowerment yeah yeah not like a the facade of it it's like okay I have this tool belt of support um and it's not even like this huge commitment okay let me watch this like one hour class or it's okay let me get this hit to remind myself of what I already know um yeah and be able to like really integrate and cement that and take that with me throughout the day I love how there's a million different ways that you could use it like you can popcorn around or you can like you said like focus on there's one audio that you really resonate with and you listen to it every day and then you know you move on when you're ready to move on um just yeah there's no water it's just all the stuff that I use I put in one place um so that you can just use it as a reference when you where you can you it's it's it would be like the definition of self-help like you're going in for yourself and you're saying what do I need to help because that that is empowerment it's you doing it yes we all need help yeah and we all need direction um and it needs to come from someone that you feel you can resonate with or you trust and that was always you know you and I have spoken about this about me using my my my four-letter words all the time and you know really it's the way I use in person but it's different when you're in person than when you're you know just on an audio or you're just doing something like this or maybe somebody's listening to me and they haven't ever met me in person um and and I decided to go the direction of yeah it's dropping the you know the F-bomb like I do in person because hopefully someone will hear me and go oh well like right she says [ __ ] she meditates let me give it a try she says while she meditates maybe I'll give it a shot at the end of the day I'm like if anyone's wildly offended by my choice of of language than perhaps then it's not for them and I yeah and that's great because I think I think this is it is such a personal thing that's the stuff really and it and that's why I always tell people too you know it's not something you have to talk about and declare in fact when when you do really feel good like even this for example I didn't think about putting this out into the public for a very long time because it was so personal and it felt like something I shouldn't really be talking about like I didn't want to go preaching around about how awesome I was feeling I couldn't believe it myself but I felt like I would be a nut job if I did that and it would be weird but then because I was teaching for so long and I had all my clients and students around me I felt like how can I not share this it's I heard them like I heard heard myself and it was like to not tell you that I'm doing this thing that I feel oddly awesome it would be weird I feel guilty for feeling this good I knew I'd be awesome like I had never experienced that before but I also it's like don't I mean everything in life there's just so many options there's so much you could learn there's a bajillion things out there and like all you want is someone close to you that you trust that like gets you that you feel like yes like we are on the same wave like just like hey this one hey this yes like I just I mean I'm a researcher I'm someone that obsesses over like understanding all of my options but like if there's someone that I get that I know gets me I think recommend something I'm like thank God I don't have to spend hours of my life trying to decipher everything and sort out what is for me like this person is just gonna give me that Beeline and that's what this is yeah yeah I mean it's what I wanted for myself I wish I didn't read all the crappy books I read and did all of your things I did the leg works and then hopefully you won't have to so you have um if anyone is listening to this and they're interested you actually have a really really really cool free writing challenge can you tell us a little bit about it because I'm going to put that link in the show notes because I've done it myself I uncovered something myself in the what 10 minutes it took to watch the video so yeah tell us about it yeah I found these two writing exercises through all of my reading and searching and everything that really really blew my mind as far as when you feel stuck like in an area of your life where you it's it's like when you feel like you're doing all the right things but you never get the results you want or you get it for a little bit but it never stays it's like an area where you just feel unsatisfied and crushed across um for me it was money it when I it was always money it was always around money I could make it but I could make it like I wanted to make it it never felt uncomfortable it felt like I had to apply an immense amount of effort to get what I wanted um and I did these two writing exercises and basically what they do is just walk you through how to uncover if you have any subconscious beliefs which most likely you do if it's an area where you're feeling like that that are directing your you know your thoughts your words and your actions which are what create the results in your life but we don't know that the beliefs are even there so that's why you feel like you're doing everything right and you can't figure out why you keep ending up in the same spot um because it is so much you know as much as I don't want to get into having like a you know crazy lady it is about our vibration and what we are putting out there and those beliefs vibrate and frequency that you want to know what you're vibrating at um what the beliefs are so so they're really simple it's just you sitting down with yourself for 15 minutes in peace and quiet and uncovering something that can literally change the whole course of your life it's really that powerful and I this is a perfect example of I wasn't telling anybody about it um and I do retreats in Patagonia Argentina and it's a wonderful place to people when it rains it's hard because you know you're in the middle of nowhere in the mountains the idea is to be outside all the time so we were sitting at home and I said to everybody would you guys want to try on this writing exercise that like totally changed my whole life I was so nervous and they were like yeah totally let's give it a shot you know and so we sat down and we did it and they were blown away it was like and it really made me realize how it could apply to anybody you know it it really could apply to I'm sure they were all working through different things they were all had completely different careers and Lifestyles and came from different countries and places and they all were like they all had holy [ __ ] moments and it was that woke me up because I was like okay Jack you should probably be sharing this with with other people because it it matters it matters it sucks to not understand why you can't get to where you want to be want to be why you're always feeling a certain way when you feel like you have all the tools and potential for it to be another way but you're not getting there everything I need what the [ __ ] you know it's really funny in the in your uh that this writing this free little writing Workshop that you're talking about when I was doing it I love how you articulated and as you're reading over what you wrote there's like a point in time where you'll feel like ah like it'll feel like that and yeah I did it I was like writing and I I uncovered some and you know whether or not you're shocked or you're like oh my God like like course that's what it is I think it's a little bit of both yeah it's both yeah I'm like I spent so much of my life being like you know telling people they don't need to be validated for you know and you know of course you don't need to prove yourself and then I found as I'm doing this exercise I wrote something that led me to write I just want to feel like people believe in me and I'm like oh my God like yeah what like I was shocked and then also wanted to like hit myself in the head let me go okay yeah it was so obvious after I read it I was like oh my gosh what was it for you with the money you said your thing was money what was your kind of aha moment with that you wrote I I didn't travel I I worked through several aha moments with this writing exercise because I apparently had very deep money issues and so I've done it a bunch of times but my the one I talked about on the in the workshop was that it's I don't trust that it will come and it was bigger than that it wasn't money it was like I don't trust life to work out the way I wanted to and and that was so big like the some of the other ones that I've gone through have been like right obviously like how did I not realize I was doing that but this one was I felt it in my chat like it was I wrote it and it was I went like wow right I mean how am I ever gonna really get where I want to get if I don't trust that it's ever coming my way or if I I don't have faith or trust in life that was really my attitude and and seeing it it takes all the power away from it yes you still have to work at changing it and now you have this new path that you have to start to build and and create the new beliefs and yes it takes work to move yourself in the direction but the the belief now doesn't have so much power because there it is so you you hear your thoughts you listen to your words you pay attention to your actions and you stop doing the things that support this belief that you don't you don't want you realize it doesn't serve you at all I want it to light like once you look at it you don't even that's the beauty of this work and the the Simplicity of it and how it's so easy to underestimate but like once you bring something like that to light it you don't even have to okay now I gotta roll up my sleeves and get really [ __ ] dirty and you know just figure out how to do this no like you saw like you can but there's another option like you saw it and now like effortlessly you will be able to recognize all of the different areas that'll pop up it's like the red truck thing oh you think about a red chocolate you see Red Rocks everywhere they're always always there but like only when you're thinking about it do you see it like it's kind of what I talk about when I talk about the photographs that I take and helping people take their right photographs it's like when you recognize or when you take a second and you're not taking photos of like just the first day of school milestones and like all the things that you see as like a traditional family whatever and you get really clear about what are the moments that really give you life like is it your morning coffee with your feet in the grass is it whatever and you start allowing yourself to take photographs as like a way of like journaling or writing or like whatever it is you those moments magnify and like they pop out at you throughout the day so it's not about like having to solve the problem or having to take the picture but like you kind of breathe more life into yourself in the moments that matter most so like you know while there's obviously something to be said for like really getting the tools and like diving deep and whatever the beauty of what you're offering here is just like just bringing to light awareness and being able to just like live into that yeah I mean I think the beauty of it and what what works for me that I like I didn't want to go for example I don't trust life I don't care why I don't care why I have that belief I just want to know how to not have it anymore I want to know how to move past it I don't care where it came from I don't care when it I learned it it doesn't matter to me because what matters to me is where I'm heading now so I needed to know that I have it but now that I know where do I go so I think that's also what what might be helpful for people about the library the digital libraries that you don't have to dig that deep if you don't want to you can just stay at a level that feels like you can incorporate it into your everyday without you being you know on the couch crying for a week because you've just dug up something that it's doable it's it's stuff you can integrate and yet it can shift your life like completely um I you know I we all have different reasons for why we want these things and we all have different reasons for the ways we're going to apply them and the things that we're looking for and and this is a great even starting place you know if you then you figure out something about yourself and you go okay this I would like to explore deeper you know why like really where is this coming from three then you can take it there if you want to but but this is something that can get you into any place that you want to know about yourself and then also how to make the changes in it and really just it's about feeling good because that's the whole point you know if you're gonna if you're gonna dig real deep but all it's gonna do is make you feel like [ __ ] for a long time then what's the point I mean the the idea is to feel good and to enjoy this weird thing that we're doing here and and and figure out how to do that you know so that is my new favorite definition of life this weird thing that we're doing here

and nobody knows what we're doing and nobody knows what they're doing you know and that's also kind of the point it's like the more you realize that I always say like you know in your 20s you you think you know everything and you don't know that you don't know anything and then you get to your 30s and you think you're the you know you go oh God I don't know anything but you feel like everybody else knows everything and then you get to your 40s and you go oh like no one knows what the [ __ ] they're doing so I can just relax

four decades to figure that out oh it actually knows what's going on and and so I think that is also it kind of takes the weight off a little bit you don't have to figure it all out to feel good you don't have to figure it all out to feel good okay maybe that's like our takeaway quote you don't have to figure it all out to feel good start feeling up feeling good now and oh my gosh watch the steps documentary if you haven't because like this is what we're talking about too it's so so good um Jenny do you have any closing thoughts anything that you just I don't know anything that we haven't talked about that you want to talk about because I feel like this I don't know this thing that you've made this Library just feels like one of the most authentic and like real things I've come across in a really long time I can get emotional because like I just feel like we've talked so much and I just know that it is the culmination of like everything that you've gone through but like put through this filter of like but what is like the most potent what is the most helpful what is the the real actual things um that will help someone to feel good and like that have helped me to feel good and uh yeah do you have anything else to say about it

I think confidence is really the most powerful thing you can have in yourself you know self-confidence and and and and a connection to something within you that is always there but you don't realize until you start doing a little bit of work um and creating a little bit of awareness and it doesn't take a lot I think that's the thing I'd love for people to know is it just it is so it can take 10 minutes of your day and you can literally start to learn how to live better it doesn't need to take a lot of research or going to the Himalayas or signing up for some intense situation it just takes 10 minutes with the intention being there and and that's it and you start to build this self-confidence and and that brings happiness and that brings a sense of peace and that stays with you no matter what's going on exterior so you know you work from the inside out rather from the outside in which is how we tend to work so you start to learn how to do that and I think that's really I I think when you can lift yourself up and you you can start to affect everybody and everything in these subtle ways but you notice the changes is is really where you start to go out I'm having a good time you know like I'm having a good time even when I'm not having a good time it's like I know that I'm feeling okay because I I have these tools I have this self-confidence um and I would just love for people to know that it just doesn't take that much it doesn't yeah and so that's why I put it all down for you oh Jenny Jenny Jenny how can we follow you where can we find you and of course all of this information will be in the show notes I'm on um Instagram I'm hosted by Jenny so website hosted by Instagram hosted by Jenny um and you can find all my stuff on there either Instagram or my website so the Retreats that I host this uh lessons from a bad yoga teacher um I have a book that's going to be coming out soon yeah yeah also do yourself a favor no matter what sign up for Jenny's email list because she sends the best email I literally laugh out loud like every single time the best emails my favorite mailing list that I'm on so

yeah that's on Instagram and on the website you can sign up for that too so yeah yeah I would love to have you on my email list yes oh my gosh Jenny thank you so much for coming on the show thank you thank you so much